Today, I gave a 37 year-old woman spinal anesthesia for a cesarean section. She had 5 living children, three of which were delivered by c-sections. The following conversation took place:
Me: You really needed a sixth one, huh?
Her: I'm actually almost a grandmother!
Me (internally): What the fuck..
Me (externally): How's that possible? Did you have your first child when you were 15?
Her: No, I was married at 15. I had her at 16. Now she's 20 and four months pregnant.
Me: What? You were afraid your grandkid would get lonely, so you decided to give him a playmate?
Her: Mwahahaha..sort of. Say, doc. I have a request to ask of you.
Me: Sure...
Her: If I die during the operation...
Me: A little morbid, aren't we?
Her: No, really.... please ask my husband to bury me in my family's cemetery, not in his family's cemetery because his father and I never got along and we'd probably spend eternity fighting under there.
Me (internally): ............What..the...fuck...?
Me (externally): Uh-huh....God willing you'll get out of here in perfect health to see your children and your grandchild, too.
Her: God willing. Won't that needle hurt my back? I tried it once before and my back hurts when I work cleaning houses.
Me: You know what else might hurt? Six pregnancies. This needle hardly compares with the load those have put on your back.
Her: Yeah, you're probably right. Will you stay with me during the operation?
Me: Sure, where else would I go?
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